Examples of judgment (2)

  Date:June 22, 1948

Testimony by sister Y. C.

  I was born into a non-Christian family. In my youth I studied in a non-Christian school. I was saved through reading about the Lord’s love in the four Gospels. At that time the school I attended forbade anyone to read the Bible. I broke the Bible into small sections and put them in my pocket so that I could carry it with me easily. One day I read Acts 6:4, which says, “We will continue steadfastly in prayer and in the ministry of the word.” I received a burden. My family was not agreeable to this, and some of them opposed my desire to seek after the Lord. But God is my all. I brushed aside their oppositions. Later I was enrolled in the Jin Ning Women’s Seminary in Nanking. But what went on there was not agreeable to my spiritual taste; I did not receive much help from the classes. I left the seminary and worked among the women in a Presbyterian Church. Once I fell from a train. The next day I vomited blood and found that I had hurt my spine. I knew that the Lord was dealing with me. He did not want me to be bound to the Presbyterian Church by human affections and circumstantial needs. I left.

  Later I went to work at the Shanghai Gospel Book Room. There was friction among the co-workers. It was difficult for me to learn the lessons. I became discouraged and could not rise up. Yet the Lord’s love constrained me, and I endured. Through this I learned to accept the discipline of the Holy Spirit and to drop the self. Once I incurred a heart disease and suffered much. I was so sick that I was ready to die. But I have never regretted taking this way. When the church was on the subject of giving our all, I struggled for a week and wondered whether I should give my all. I knew that if I did not yield my all, I would be finished. God, however, did not want me to be finished, so I offered up my all. Now I have no more problems, except with my “self.” Once I let go of the self, there will be no more problems. I have no desire to do any work. All I want is to live according to God’s will.

Brother Nee’s comment

  Our sister’s testimony shows that she is a frank and straightforward person. But when such frankness and straightforwardness is mixed with the spirit, it is hard to deal with the former characteristics. A man’s virtues and characteristics exert much influence upon his condition before the Lord. These virtues and characteristics should be nurtured in the spirit and covered by the spirit. As far as history is concerned, there was a fundamental problem with the church in Shanghai during the time our sister was there: Everyone was doing his own thing. There was no good coordination. There was no supply of the Body, and the work was not in one accord. There was no authority, no arrangement, and everything was left to run its own course. But now we all have seen our mistake. If the light we have received is strong enough, our sister will be spared many sufferings.

  As far as our sister’s personal experiences are concerned, I will repeat the statement that unless we are ready to let God touch us, our spirit cannot climb to a higher level. May the Lord bless our sister and manifest more of His work through her.